Nothing Like Slapping a Perfect Stranger

I did something a bit out of character for me today. I slapped a total stranger upside the head. But I can explain!

So I was in the neighborhood of my favorite garden center and had popped in to pick up some native perennials for the huge gardens I am putting in by the woods. I just realized I have not yet posted about these - it's a big project that I'm really excited about! Anyway, there I was waiting in a long line, minding my own business. I was bored (I hate standing still for more than 9 seconds) and in the course of looking around, noticed one of these:


It was the size of a nickel and was making it's creepy little way up the shirt of the woman in front of me. I started to ask her if she wanted me to get it off, but just as I opened my mouth, the thing lifted it's nasty little legs and was about to crawl onto her neck. Well. What would you have done? I slapped the damn thing off her neck just as she turned her face to see what the psycho woman in back of her was up to. And just as I whacked the evil critter off of her, I had her in the face!

I was mortified and apologizing up a storm. Eventually she understood that it was the spider I had meant to assault and not her, although she WAS taking way too long at the register. And she gave me a hug and thanked me. The other people who witnessed the attack all agreed that they would rather be slapped by a total stranger than have a spider crawling on their neck, too. The whole time we were discussing this, we were all scratching ourselves and wiggling around. I'll bet you are now, too. (You're welcome. This is called "desensitizing" in the twisted world of psychology. Just so you know.)

Does anyone out there have a funny story to tell about either having a creepy crawler encounter or accidently whacking an innocent stranger? Please share! I take comfort when I know I'm not the only nut job out there.

Now on to the good stuff. The stuff you really came here to see...the Greensburg Square contest prizes. Without further ado, here they are:

These little apple-green pretties are Lana del Artista superwash merino sock wool from Rio de la Plata yarns. 437 yards of soft, springy yumminess. I bought these yarns in the early spring, thinking I might make a shawl. But since they're green, as in Greensburg, I thought they'd be perfect for prizes. And the fun part?
This third ball is for me. I have decided to take the plunge - this yummy little yarn cake is going to be my first pair of socks.

"If you think she's a nut job now, wait till she starts trying to knit socks."

Finally, one of my alert readers, Cole, left a comment on the recent post regarding the exploits of one Abbie Bad Beagle. She made the very reasonable suggestion that if we got Abbie a stuffed buny she would leave her bad bunny-chasing days behind her and stop giving her mom and dad grey hairs (or should that be 'hares'?). Cole, thank you for the good advice but...we're talking a beagle here! They are not reasonable nor are they very smart. Most people don't realize that the real reason God invented humans was to keep the beagles out of trouble.

Anyway, not only does does Abbie have a furry stuffed bunny (that squeaks), she also has a stuffed squirrel, octopus, duck, crab, frog, lamb, smiley face and 2 fluffy-tail zebra tennis balls. But even this vast array of stuffed squeaky fake-furry goodness is not enough to quell the temptation of an open door.

Abbie plans her next break-out while baking her brains.


Priscilla said...

Good for you, starting to knit socks. You may find it is addictive, though! I took a class about a year ago and made my first pair. I am still working on my second pair, but even though I am slow at it, I absolutely love knitting socks. It is like no other knitting I have done. I really want to get better at it so that I get faster and can make more pairs. Good luck!

Oh, and btw, I am going to make more squares for Greensburg this month. I think I have another strategy for making 8" squares on the bias. I'll keep you posted!

Anonymous said...

Glad to see Abbie got her a bunny! Only time will tell if she has left her bunny chasing days behind. :)

Sonya said...

That stuffed bunny looks very real.

When my oldest was not quite two, we had gone to the park. He loved rolling down a big hill. After the fourth or fifth roll, I saw that he was really dirty. The black specs were not dirt, they were black ants! He began to cry and I was a little freaked out. I stripped him right there. He even had ants in his diaper. For several years he was terrified of all ants. He still gets a little grossed out and stomps them whenever he can.

Nichole said...

Gorgeous yarn - can't wait to see your first pair of socks on the needles!

Dianne said...

Abbie looks so cute and sweet and innocent lying there in the sun. One warning about sock knitting, prepare to be hooked. I started knitting socks almost 10 years ago now and cannot stop. You might as well clear some space in your closets for sock yarn now, because they are addictive!

knitten kitten said...

Once while standing in line I had turned around for something and happened to notice that the lady behind me was wearing a shirt that seemed to move (on it's own). While I was wondering if her boobs were perhaps being invaded by aliens, a strange look must have come across my face. She unbuttoned the top button of her blouse and as I was certain I was about to get flashed by a complete stranger she revealed her very large and super creepy pet snake which was slithering around in her shirt. I DON"T LIKE SNAKES, so I gave her a weak smile, ushered my little one far away, paid, and got myself outta' there as quickly as I could. I'm probably a bit nutty but IMO there is no such thing as a harmless snake!

Terri said...

Sock knitting is very addictive, as you can tell by my blog... I can in fact knit other things too, not as though anyone could tell though.

By the way, if we ever meet and you see a spider ANYWHERE ON ME, smack me upside the head, knock me down, beat me sideways - just GET IT OFF!!!

Anonymous said...

I glad you're already picking out yarn for your 1st pair of socks. :-)

No, I've never slapped someone while I was standing in line. I've shot eye daggers at strangers....but that's it.

your lurking Dishcloth swap pal